Sunday, 11:37pm

Ignorance is not bliss.

Ignorance is ignorance. So don’t give it power to lead your actions or reactions.

This past week has been one of the more emotionally heavy weeks in 2017:

  1. My student’s father’s company got a report for having hired immigrants. Her father got deported to TJ in a day’s time. She misses 4 days of school then I run into her mother in the office. Her mother sees me, holds me, and sobs in my arms. The only other time we’ve met was with a translator between us. All I could offer were my hugs and nods. My student shows up to school the next day with a smile on her face, “I missed you, Ms. Kim.” In her free-write journal, “I want to be a teacher one day just so I can share the warmth and smiles Ms. Kim shares with us everyday no matter what is going on in our life.”
  2. Another student of mine lost his father last year in the military. Earlier this school year, his mother lost custody of her six sons. My student lives with his grandmother and his brothers. We’re taking a test and he comes up to me, “I really need to talk to you. I don’t know what to do.” We step out of the classroom and he explains that the police came to his home late the night before and cuffed his oldest brother (high school) in front of all his brothers (youngest one being 5 years old). In the moment, he’s looking up at me with tears filling his eyes from confusion, fear in possibility of losing another family member, who-knows-what-else-filling-his-sweet-10-year-old-mind. It took all of me not to say, Everything’s going to be okay because who the hell knows if things will be. I told him honestly that I don’t want to promise false anythings, because I don’t know the situation. Instead, I told him to focus on what he did have control over: being a student and being an older + younger brother. That he especially needed to stay strong for the two under him, who were probably even more confused and scared. I’m sure he didn’t quite understand to the extent I was going for, but he held my hand and wiped his tears. It took me by surprise how naturally these words spilled from my mouth. He came to school the next day with homework completed (including the missing assignments from weeks before).

It really puts life into perspective when you realize how resilient children are.

I’m humbled and love everyday because of these crazy, sassy 10-year-olds. These unbearable weeks every once in awhile shine light on the reason why I chose this career path and culture to serve.

Heart-tugging lessons:

  1. I truly believe God is good, all the time.
  2. Accept the truth no matter how painful.
  3. We don’t need spoken language to understand loss / hopelessness.
  4. We also don’t need spoken language to share / show / give love.
  5. Sometimes being present is plenty.

In the quiet, in the stillness 

I know that You are God

In the secret of Your presence

I know there I am restored

In the chaos, in confusion

I know You’re sovereign still

In the moment of my weakness

You give me grace to do Your will